Another Spectrum

Personal ramblings and rants of a somewhat twisted mind

Aspie Challenge #1


It’s always my fault

When I fail to understand what a neurotypical person means (which is quite often), it’s MY FAULT.
When a neurotypical person fails to understand what I mean (Which is quite often), it’s MY FAULT.

Author: Barry

A post war baby boomer from Aotearoa New Zealand who has lived with migraines for as long as I can remember and was diagnosed as being autistic aged sixty. I blog because in real life I'm somewhat backwards about coming forward with my opinions.

4 thoughts on “Aspie Challenge #1

  1. People often take you at your own estimation. The trouble is you have internalised that kind of idea. They say it’s your fault, you are not immediately dismissive of the idea, they press their advantage.

    No. It is not your fault.

    • It’s a challenge precisely because I don’t think I’m at fault.

      Not so long ago, I was in a conversation with a woman, and she clearly felt that I was failing to fully comprehend her opinion of a certain public figure. I thought I did understand, and was trying to relay back what I thought she meant. She became more and more agitated and finally blurted out loudly “Oh, you’re the most exasperating idiot I’ve ever met! You couldn’t find your way out of a wet paper bag!” There was a moment’s silence in the room, then someone came over to her and said “I’m sorry. He can’t help it. He’s autistic”.

      Had the shoe been on the other foot, and it had been me that had made the outburst, then someone would have come over and said to me “That’s totally unnecessary!”, then they would have turned to the woman and said “I’m sorry. He can’t help it. He’s autistic”.

      Internally, I was probably just as frustrated as that woman, and I’ll probably have more frustrating conversations in a year than she’ll have in her lifetime. Yet it’s “understandable” if she gets angry at me, but “unacceptable” if I get angry at her. That’s what I’m referring to.

    • Happens regularly. You’d be surprised how many people who call out racism, sexism, etc for what it is – discrimination and social prejudice – but fail to realise that they are guilty of ableism.

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