Another Spectrum

Personal ramblings and rants of a somewhat twisted mind

What a load of bull!

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Whenever I travel to Whanganui to visit friends and family, I pass through the small town of Bulls (population: 1,800). There is not much that is particularly remark-a-bull about the town, except it enjoys making unforget-a-bull puns with its name. They are to be seen everywhere, which does make the town rather memor-a-bull. A large sign as you enter Bulls makes it obvious that the locals enjoy making fun of the name: Herd of Bulls? It’s a town like no udder.

Some of the puns are terr-a-bull, others are incred-a-bull. So here, without further ado are just a few of the building signs that can bee seen as you pass through.

  • Avail-a-bull: Dairy (convenience store)
  • Bank-a-bull: Bank
  • Const-a-bull: Police station
  • Cure-a-bull: medical centre
  • Delect-a-bull: Café
  • Eat-a-bull: A delicatessen
  • Everything imagine-a-bull: Farm park & café
  • Extinguish-a-bull: Fire station
  • Fashion-a-bull: Women’s apparel
  • Forgive-a-bull: Anglican church
  • Full-as-a-bull: local pub
  • Indispense-a-bull: Pharmacy
  • Inform-a-bull: The information centre
  • Irresist-a-bull: Sweet shop (candy store)
  • List-a-bull: A real estate agency
  • Live-a-bull: Another real estate agency
  • Love-a-bull: Childcare centre
  • Memor-a-bull: Museum
  • Non-return-a-bull: Plunket Society (support services for the development, health and well-being of children under 5)
  • Park-a-bull: A car park (parking lot)
  • Read-a-bull: Public Library
  • Reliev-a-bull: Public restrooms
  • ReSpect-A-bull: RSA (Returned Services Association – a non-profit society for ex-military personnel)
  • Stock-a-bull: Supermarket
  • Store-a-bull: Storage facility
  • Social-a-bull: Town hall
  • Veget-a-bull: Fruit & vegetable shop
  • Wear-a-bull: Clothing shop

They haven’t stopped at building signs. For example, wording on public rubbish bins (trash cans) urge you to be “RESPONSE-A-BULL”.

One company in particular (Palat-a-bull) has taken the Bulls branding to another level. Here’s a list of some of their products:bulls-semen-salad-sauce3

  • Genuine Bulls Cream – Cream from Bulls (cream)
  • Bulls Semen – extracted from Bulls with their consent (salad sauce)
  • Bulls Eye Chilli Sauce – This ‘lord of the ring’ chilli sauce was tested on Bulls
  • Grill-a-Bulls (a range of sausages)
  • Bulls Wool – It’s about ewe and your baa skin (a range of merino wool products)

A signpost at the intersection of two highways even includes a sign pointing to Cowes in Australia!

What makes this town so remark-a-bull is that it’s the only place in the world where you can get milk from Bulls. I think that’s enough puns for one day.

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Author: Barry

A post war baby boomer from Aotearoa New Zealand who has lived with migraines for as long as I can remember and was diagnosed as being autistic aged sixty. I blog because in real life I'm somewhat backwards about coming forward with my opinions.

One thought on “What a load of bull!

  1. Definitely a post-a-bull story – quite incred-a-bull and laugh-a-bull. Ha! Quite remark-a-bull really. Thanks Barry. 😀

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